first
they say if you're not first you're last, the first of anything is more special than anything that comes after it. they also say that the last of anything is the most valuable - i wonder who they is and who gives a fuck what they think. this is my first blog on my new shiny website, truth be told i've either been involved, built or overseen so many websites being built it's almost like i'm a website builder - i am not.
unless you are blind you should notice straight away that this site is void of color, pictures & all the other shit everyone tells you that you'll need to get attention, people following you, likes and whatever else we all seek these days. isn't it ironic that facebook has a button to like things, when the site was created by a guy who obviously didn't have much of a social life or a lot of people that liked him. that's the irony in culture these days, the misfits, nerds & so on are shaping the way we communicate & our view on popularity.
if you're starting to think this blog post is rambling you get an A for being perceptive, but as fate would have it - i'm going to settle in and talk about something other than random shit. the topic is firsts & here goes my first - get it - never mind. i've had a lot of firsts - love, jobs, kisses, dates, cars, places, birthdays (you're thinking birthdays there is only one birthday - not true every year we age is the first birthday at that age).
in my 20's i was obsessed with being first in everything, now in my 30's i won't lie & say it's not important but it's not as important as it was, because quality of things has taken precedent over the actual place i end up. in my experience first has always been the one you tried the hardest at, but every subsequent time you got better, whatever it was would be more enjoyable after every time, being able to do it better than the last time was more fun.
not so much pressure as the first; besides first is a lonely place, for fuck's sake where else is there to go after being first? i'll answer that one - no where but down, which usually results in trying to be first again, if you're starting to see a pattern here - kudos to you. my first kiss was awkward, please don't pretend or kid yourself that yours wasn't either - these days i can lock lips with the best of them, but my first kiss was a shit show.
it was in my mom's salon to a beautiful girl who shall remain nameless - she is married now and we are still friends - let's leave it at that. my first time having sex was even more of a mess, the anticipation, the build up & after 60 seconds it was over - i think. in all honesty sex didn't become good until about the 5th or 6th time & even now it seems to get better with each go.
my first job was a joke as well, it was working at a nursery (not the kid kind, the plant kind) it was hot, low paying & shitty. i still remember working with the people there, one was my friend from school who's father owned it. the cast & crew of this place played out like a cross between the rocky horror picture show, duck dynasty & vanderpump rules - actually the last one i just threw in to let my readers know i know what is going on in the reality world. the owner was stuck in the closet, the head guy was a stuttering fool, my direct boss i'm sure didn't have a green card, the only woman was a gossipy, old hag & to round it all out was a fair-haired fella who mumbled.
hard to believe i know that these guys weren't in public office, although i'm certain they could've done a better job than our current leaders. however that job taught me that manual labor wasn't in the cards for me & now i'm glad it showed me there is a better way to earn money. i'm from the south where there is still a mindset that real work involves getting your hands dirty - i think that however you earn a living is hard work regardless of where your hands are. if you don't hurt old people, animals, children or women then you have my respect.
my first love was strange as every one else's i'm sure. it was in my 10th grade year - let me explain something beforehand - it was actually in 9th grade, but that girl didn't know i longed for her until years later & by then i didn't. back to the first love - she was a blonde haired girl who was new at our school, we sat beside each other in biology - (which was a very valuable class i can't think of a day that i don't need the skills i learned there, just the other day i was dissecting a shark & smiled fondly at the thought of my biology teacher & the value of that class). she sat beside me & before you knew it we were "dating" - which meant we would go do things with either her parents or mine present as they provided the wheels until i got my license.
one thing that always struck me as weird was that her dad made a comment about me having side burns, meanwhile he had a set also. this was during the heyday of 90210 - i was a cross between dylan and brandon - well more like my hair was, but that's how i like to remember it. my first love was fleeting & by 12th grade i had been in numerous silly high school relationships. however i'll never forget how it felt when her & i split - it was the first time i was sad & the pain i felt wasn't sports related or a result of misbehaving - it was inside of me & it stung.
i've experienced many losses since then & i'm not sure whatever happened to my first love. i'm certain she has never loved another man like me, but we all must move on at some point. in my late 20's i lost someone i deeply loved & it was completely my fault - it wasn't until many years later that i made peace with it. when we are young we never think we will regret anything, i know people always claim they have no regrets, but if you didn't regret things - no one would ever say they are sorry. think about that, get my point - see how that went down - uncle rodney knows a few things.
one first i always will remember fondly was the first time i sold something - now i should tell you one of my greatest pleasures in life is getting other to do what i want them to do, not out of fear, or because of lying, but solely by convincing them it's what they want to do. anyone who is a true salesman/woman knows exactly what i mean. my mom was in an association and they were raffling tickets for a ridiculous amount of free groceries.
to understand & appreciate this story you'll need to know a few things about my mom. she is one of the nicest people you'll ever meet, she doesn't like to lose, she doesn't suffer fools & she never liked excuses. growing up my mom owned hair salons, so a great deal of my time was spent listening to women go on about their men, recipes, gossiping & so on. after school i would go to my mom's salons, after my homework was done (if you can believe it i was the only kid in the history of school who never was assigned any homework, more on that another day) i was allowed to ride my bike, go play with my friends in the area and so on.
one day after school my mom told me as i hopped into the car that the group was selling tickets for a raffle, my mom was the president of the association. that meant she needed to make sure she sold all of her tickets, i didn't think much of it until a few days later when i wanted to head over to les's to ride bikes and terrorize his younger brother. my mom said no way, so i thought how could i get out that door - it came to me like a song i wrote - i'll sell some tickets. i told my mom i wanted to see if i could sell some tickets - she laughed thinking i was just trying to get outside - she was very much right.
my mom finally agreed to let me try to sell a few & even challenged me that she didn't think i could sell any - i don't like being challenged on anything. so i hit the door with 20 tickets on a mission to show her what i was all about. they were $5 a piece - i charted out in my mind who i could sell them to. i first hit the elderly lady across the street of the community - she always liked me & gave me change so as i knocked on her door - i had the pitch ready. she answered & i explained what it was for - i'm sure she didn't understand what i was selling, but she bought one from me.
with my confidence soaring i knew i could sell more, my next house was a lady who always smiled at me & my step dad was friends with her husband, she tried to tell me she didn't have a $5, i quickly rebutted that a $20 would work as well & that her odds would be much better - she complied. i won't bore you with every stop, but in a matter of 4 weeks i had sold every ticket they had, i sold so many tickets they had more printed. one night while i was watching my shows before bed i thought what if my friends sold them for me.
the next day i held a meeting with my friends & we hit the streets with one directive - sell tickets. my mom was impressed by my prowess, but it didn't stop there - every time there was something i could sell it was never a competition. sure, i would get people with lame excuses, stories why they couldn't buy whatever i was selling, but by age 12 i heard them all & had an answer for anything they threw at me.
back to raffle, the day of it was a busy day. because of my work selling the most tickets anyone had ever sold i was allowed on stage to help draw the winner for all the other prizes - the grand prize being the groceries. they had a brown food lion bag - the grocery store who the prize would be from on the stage, my job was to reach in and pick the winner out- the big day was here, i reached my hand down in that bag & when i pulled out the ticket the number read happen to be my mom's.
unfuckingbelievable right - it's true she won, i promise you there was no foul play. there were no names on the tickets it was all numbers. my mom donated it to a less fortunate family & at the time i didn't understand why we didn't keep it after all my hard work, but now i do. my mom told me after how proud she was of me & that my hard work had helped someone in need - maybe so & for that i'm thankful. more importantly though that charted me on a path that to this day i follow.
every job i've held (other than the manual labor jobs) has been in sales & i've never desired to do anything else. if i can't control what i make i have no interest, now i own companies, but i still sell everyday. it's funny people will tell me they hate sales, how they could never do it & that salesmen/women are all shadesters. here's a tidbit friends we all sell - every day, either you are selling someone or they are selling you.
out of all my firsts selling those raffle tickets has shaped my life more than any other in my life, sometimes before a big meeting these days i go back to mrs. jane's front door & i tell myself - ok it's ms. jane, these tickets are only $5 & they are for a good cause - then i lean in & sell.
until then,
rodney